Mystical Formulas

This afternoon, I went through some old emails. I found one I wrote about the traditional Christian understanding of marriage. Included were two "equations" that I felt illustrated a mystical truth.

a) Christ = Head = Husband = Male
b) Church = Body = Bride = Female

The two can be understood as working in tandem to illustrate spiritual truths being made manifest via the marital relationship. Christian marriage is a picture (would my Orthodox friends say 'icon'?) of the relationship between Christ and His Bride, His very Body, the Church. Viewing it this way forces talk of headship and submission. It cannot be avoided if the analogy is true. This is an unpopular view, and with good reason. It falls far short of explaining a profound mystery (not that humans can really explain such things, but we can try).

This is the most narrow definition of marriage I have encountered: a lifelong, monogamous, heterosexual relationship, with a hierarchical structure thrown in for good measure. Are people who embrace this view sexist? Are they homophobic? Sure, some of them. But others see a burden of chastity (not to be confused with celibacy) equally shared by all: married, single, gay, straight, male, and female. In other words, they believe Christians who are not married must abstain from what is appropriately called the "marital act." And I think the more thoughtful ones understand headship and submission to be attitudes that operate within the context of a oneness that defies logic; two become one, and yet each retains individuality. I suspect husbands can only exercise a healthy "headship" when they serve as primus inter pares, mustering all the courage they can to figure out what the hell it means to be "first among equals" when there can be no majority vote. Marriage is, after all, a partnership of two.

I don't know. I really don't. I'm a bachelor with old sweaters and far too many books. No cats though ... yet.